Discuss Together

  • Have you ever been on the receiving end of a half-hearted apology or non-apology? How did you know it wasn’t real? How did it make you feel? What is the difference between that and a real apology?

  • Read Psalm 51. What are some of the words and phrases that stand out to you about David’s response to his own failure?

  • How does failure affect you? Does it crush you? Demotivate you? Drive you? Share with the group.

  • Read 2 Corinthians 7:10. What is the difference between godly sorrow versus worldly sorrow? Have you experienced the kind of sorrow that led to freedom, change, and life? Share with the group.

  • In Psalm 51:3, David says, “For I know my transgressions and my sin is always before me.” He admits his sin. Greg said, “Change cannot begin until blame-shifting ends.” Why is it so easy to fall into the trap of blame-shifting? Do you agree with what Greg said? Why?

  • When you have failed, how did you think God thought about you in that moment? Has your view changed over time?

  • Read Psalm 51:16-17. If God doesn’t delight in sacrifice, what does He delight in? What is God asking us to do when we fail?

  • What have you learned about navigating failure in a way that doesn’t lead to shame?

  • Is there an area of failure you are wrestling with right now? If you are comfortable, share with your group.

NEXT STEPS

When we fail, it’s easy to fall into a shame spiral. Consider learning more about the difference between guilt and shame by reading content by a researcher like Brené Brown or discussing with a counselor. And bring any guilt and shame you’re carrying right now to our loving heavenly Father, who is ready to meet you with love, mercy, and grace.